** Morning Intention: To see the importance of trial and error in living well.
In our culture, there’s a lot of what I call “guidance-counselor advice.” I mean no disrespect to all guidance counselors, many of whom are excellent. But back in high school, mine weren’t. They’d yell, “What do you want to do with your life?” and then, when you naturally hesitated, they’d look at your transcript to see what you were already good at and make a recommendation based on your grades. And still, beyond high school, so much of the life-advice we give each other comes from a fear of not “winning,” with the result that not only do we not try new things, but also, we don’t see that learning itself is what makes us happy — not already being good at this or that.
In breath meditation, we are always confronting a mind that wants to fall back on what it’s already good at. Most of us, for example, tend to breathe in an exaggerated way when we meditate, a way that actually isn’t pleasant or easeful. We breathe the way we think we’re supposed to or the way that worked in the past, even if it doesn’t now. So a good practice is to pick a length or rhythm of breathing at random and try to find the ease in it over a minute or two. If it feels good, keep breathing that way; if it doesn’t, pick a new way of breathing. This simple practice of experimentation teaches us so much about moving beyond our preferences and finding joy in learning new things.
So here’s the practice: Sit for just five minutes. As you do, pick a rhythm or length of breathing at random and make up your mind that you are going to “copy” it for a while, just to learn what it can offer in the way of ease and groundedness. Put aside your desire for this or that attainment. Learning how to experiment is the most important thing you will ever do with your life.
Featured Image by Jess Pollack
Paul Weinfield 